Screaming and yelling and still no result …. The feeling of talking to a brick wall. That’s what most of my friends have been telling me is going on when they talk to their children these school holidays.
Pick up your clothes, don’t hit your sister, pack up this mess, and eat your dinner ….. The list is endless. As parents it can feel that we spend our life or a good majority of it screaming to get things done. And children seem to spend most of their time ignoring this or complaining about it.
So why does it always seem to boil down to a battle of wills. Simple really imagine if your boss screamed at you to get things done how quickly would you tell your boss to take a hike! It would not take long, at the very least you most certainly would be looking for a new job.
So since our children can’t or we hope never tell us to take a hike or look for new parents, perhaps it is in the way we approach the request that needs to change. So here are some simple strategies to try before our children do tell us to take a hike or worst still turn into the screaming teenage/adult from hell!
- Set some simple chores that are age appropriate and don’t need to be done every day, responsibility is a good thing but keep it balanced.
- If the room is mess does it really matter that much? If your child is tired you are fighting a losing battle that will only see you get a headache, shut the door and tackle it tomorrow when calm.
- Stop yelling and screaming, talk to your child the way you want to be spoken to, not only is it more effective you will then raise a child that has respect.
- Get down and play with them, encourage creative play, have FUN, build a cubby house, and as you help make the mess you get to help tidy the mess.
- Half an hour before bed make it wind down time, grab a book and read to your child or if your child can read then read the book together.
- Get outside with your child go for a walk, take them to the park, not only do you get outdoors you get exercise as well.
- Count to 10 and step outside if the stress is getting to much, fresh air calms down most and a little bit of space can give you the perspective as an adult to know the right course of action to take.
- Encourage them to make the right choices when being asked to do things, this will help them in later life.
- Surprise your child with a reward, don’t let them expect it like pocket money, just surprise them with a reward of your choice.
Our child are only our children for a short period of time, before long they are young adults trying to be the best they can in the world. They learn how to do this from you, have fun, enjoy them and most of all love and respect them…… the world will thank you for it.